COUPLED: Reality TV and My 10 MUST-HAVES in a Man

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Everyone should have a “list” for what they are looking for in a partner right?? So here’s mine.

What I’m looking for in a man:

  • Christian with a strong relationship with God because LOVE IS 1 Corinthians 13:4 & I desire a Christ-centered relationship. (Patient, KIND, keeps no record of wrong doing, etc)
  • Unique sense of humor – I NEED to laugh! I’m a big kid and love laughing at myself, at my man, and with my man. Laughter really is the best medicine!!
  • Athletic/tall build – I’m 5’8” and I love wearing heels and want to still feel small next to him.
  • Amazing family/family oriented – when you date me you date my family. And when I date, I get attached to family rather quickly since I myself am so family oriented. I love big families with kids everywhere! The bigger the better.
  • Foooooiiiine… but yet doesn’t know how attractive he is. AKA HUMBLE.
  • Intelligence is sexy. So is generosity.
  • Must love and want kids. I’m not opposed a man who already has kids BUT I’d LOVE LOVE LOVE to give that gift to my husband one day – our first child, together… that whole experience is something I dream about. I want to be a mommy!
  • Speaking of kids… MUST. LOVE. DOGS too!!!!!!!! Especially my dog, Romeo. Or it’s BUH-BYE papi.
  • Affirms and encourages me in my field of work without being jealous. (The right amount of jealousy is cute though.) *Words of affirmation is key* as it’s one of my love languages.
  • P.D.A is a must –I want a man who cant help but to have his hands all over me and is super affectionate no matter who is looking!!! My other love language is physical touch.
  • Protective – will defend me to no end. I want that “ride or die, Bonnie & Clyde, it’s you and me against the world” type of love. I’m just looking for a best friend, at the end of the day – that’s the best kind of relationship to have.

So lets talk about this whole COUPLED thing. It’s a new dating show on FOX and I am honored to say I am part of season 1! Shooting started in February and ended in March. Its been a week since the premiere and tomorrow is episode two. This is so exciting!! It’s a Mark Burnett Production so I couldn’t pass up the opportunity because Mark Burnett is known for being Christian, and none of his shows are salacious, malicious or defaming in any way. (Shark Tank, The Voice, Survivor)

As for me, I’ve always been in serious relationships (pretty much back to back) and never really just plain dated. After over a year of being single I knew it was time for me to get out there again and start to date. So why not do it on national television? And why not in the Caribbean?

Obviously I can’t share details or give too much away, but be sure to tune in every Tuesday night @9pm on Fox to see if I checked off “my list” and found me a man or not 😉

Be sure to follow along on social media @aliciamblanco throughout the season for behind the scenes pics from the season.

Besitos!

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REPOSTED: THIS VICTORIA’S SECRET MODEL IS DOING A 180 FROM HER DAYS AS AN ANGEL

by: ALISON FELLER via http://www.wellandgood.com

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As a Victoria’s Secret model, Erin Heatherton was one of the wing-adorned “angels” stalking runways in lingerie and flashing her pearly whites on billboards, buses, and beyond in the name of the brand. But now she admits life with Victoria’s Secret wasn’t always as chill and Swarovski-studded as it may have seemed—she faced serious body image struggles during her time with the bra-and-panty brand, Time reports.

“My last two Victoria’s Secret shows, I was told I had to lose weight,” she tells Time. “I look back like, ‘Really?’” Heatherton, who walked in the Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show from 2008 to 2013, left the brand three years ago when, in spite of working hard, eating healthy, and exercising twice a day, she says her body “just wouldn’t do it.”

I was really depressed because I was working so hard and I felt like my body was resisting me,” she says. “And I got to a point where one night I got home from a workout and I remember staring at my food and thinking maybe I should just not eat.” After walking away from the runway, Heatherton came to a startling realization: “I realized I couldn’t go out into the world—parading my body and myself in front of all these women who look up to me—and tell them that this is easy and simple and everyone can do this,” she says.

Via Heather’s Instagram:

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The breakdown to breakthrough moment in my life has allowed me to become the truest version of myself. In my moment of “failure,” I stood in the face of adversity. I was struggling with my body image and the pressures to fulfill the demands of perfectionism upon me. I am not perfect. Through this struggle, however, I found the strength to love myself. I stood in my power. I thought of one of my favorite quotes, “Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a men’s character, give him power” – Abraham Lincoln. I look back on that moment now, and I embrace it. This feeling I once perceived as “failure” was, in truth, a powerful awakening for me to stand behind my purpose in life. I stepped away from hiding behind a fabricated version of myself. I no longer put actions behind my fears and insecurities. I made a choice to redirect my energy to be a catalyst for change. To create a channel for women to become the truest versions of themselves, along with me. (Stay tuned for more…) In the end, if you aren’t being true to yourself, then what the fuck is the point. #rebelwacause #empowerment #womensempowerment#empoweredbyyou

Now, the always-athletic supermodel (she played on her high school’s varsity basketball team, according to the Sun Times), is using her platform to spread awareness in hopes of helping other women. “I’m willing to sacrifice my pride, in a sense, and my privacy because I know that if I don’t speak about it, I could be withholding information that would really help women,” she says. “It hurts too much to keep it in, and that’s why I’m not keeping it in now.”

From Miss Arizona to Misunderstood

By: Alicia M. Blanco

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Lately I’ve been doing a lot of traveling for work which I find to be extremely fulfilling and rejuvenating. (Refer back to my blog “Why Traveling is Good for your Mental Health” from last year.) In fact, I’ve been so busy that I haven’t blogged in almost a year!! But traveling is such an awesome part of life that I feel everyone should try to do more of. YOU MEET SO MANY PEOPLE, and these people from all around the world help to teach you more about yourself.

My newest “discovery” that I’ve acquired from my travels is that being misunderstood reeeeeallllllly sucks. Like, REALLY, REALLY SUCKS. Whether it’s an actual language barrier where you struggle to understand what the frack someone is saying and therefore preventing you from having a conversation of substance, or even being able to order a high-maintenance coffee (I like an iced, dirty venti chai tea latte with coconut milk and extra chai and two shots..and light ice. Because I’m a diva.) And you can forget trying to order a grande double shot vanilla bean frappuccino with exxxxxtra caramel inside the cup and on top with light whip cream…I guess it’s way too complicated of an order.

And then there are the cultural differences. Different people from different parts of the world will interact, speak, react, and even drive differently. Tempers are different. Attitudes are different. Levels of patience are different. EVERYONE IS DIFFERENT! (…and thank GOD for that because we would be so bored if everyone was the same, wouldn’t we!?)

But I would gladly take on annnnnny language barrier/misunderstanding in the world over being misunderstood for who I am on the inside.

Recently I’ve had a few experiences while traveling where my heart, my integrity and my character was misunderstood- and it absolutely wrecked me.

But I learned that even the crappy things that happen to us serve a huge purpose in our lives.

Being misunderstood taught me 3 things:

  1. I love my family and friends like CRAZY and need to show it more when I’m HOME!! – I always knew I loved them, but after so much traveling and several different time zones, I learned just how much I value their opinions– and only their opinions. “People who mind don’t matter and people who matter, don’t mind.” Knowing I have an amazing group of people to come home to whenever I’m gone for extended periods of time gets me through. While I am so inspired by all the people I am meeting while traveling, I had to learn to reject opinions from people who don’t fully know me. It took me a long time to do this but once I did, it was extremely liberating. You cannot let the opinions of others define you, or worse, hurt you. And you certainly shouldn’t let opinions change who you are. #ohhayyyllno “Lions don’t lose sleep over the opinions of sheep.” I definitely need to show more appreciation for the people I love when I’m home. Whenever I’m gone I find myself swearing I’m going to be better about calling my mama and sister every single day since it’s hard to do when traveling. I need their opinions. I need to hear their voices.
  2. Stereotypes still exist.. um, what the heck!? – Whenever I personally encounter being stereotyped for being a pageant girl, it hurts! I can’t tell you how many times people assume I have a competitive spirit in every aspect of my life… or they assume I’m nothing but makeup and hair full time and that I’m putting up a façade. In the social media crazed world we live in today, it’s impossible to avoid being judged. You can sit behind a computer screen (or on your phone) for hours just scrolling through someone’s profile and judging them without even realizing it!  WE ARE ALL GUILTY OF THIS. Ladies, you should NEVER have to explain who you are to anyone! Stay true to who you are, even if the world has stereotypes surrounding the way you look, dress, speak and carry yourself, just keep your chin up otherwise your crown may slip. Besides, going to Miss USA is a one of the greatest accomplishments of my whole life and I’m so proud of it! I shouldn’t have to defend it or adapt to others in order to be understood or accepted. (Side note: the irony about ever being called a “pageant girl” in a negative way, is that I wasn’t raised in the industry. I was dared into my first pageant in my early 20s. So I can’t help but to laugh whenever people think I was born and bred to COMPETE…as if that’s a bad thing anyway?!)
  3. KINDNESS is key. – The whole entire purpose of my blog is to promote kindness and paying it forward! While traveling, it just comes natural to me to stay true to myself and be kind, always – even when someone is being completely unkind towards me. One of my favorite scriptures says, “If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink; for by doing so you heap burning coals on his head. Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.” Romans 2:19-21 – Whenever I come across someone who is being difficult at the airport or on my flights or in my hotels, I overcome it by being extra nice. I always get such a priceless look on their faces.

It’s hard to put into words how gratifying it is to be kind when someone deserves it the least. I am always so hopeful that it will change the direction of their day, reboot their mindset altogether and maybe even lead to them taking on a different attitude and paying it forward for the rest of their day. And even if it doesn’t, I still walk away feeling good! Besides, everyone you meet is fighting something that you know NOTHING about. Always give the benefit of the doubt. Always be the advocate for someone who isn’t around to defend themselves. Take the high road. Speak words of encouragement. You never know how profoundly it can impact someone for the better!

Still, we are human and we are going to get hurt. The more I travel the more I’ve come to appreciate how drastically different we all handle being hurt. I think it’s a beautiful thing to learn from other people and it’s something I take seriously with every trip I take.

Anyways, just had to get this off my chest. Excited to be back in the blogsphere! I’m sure I will have lots to say in the coming months but no matter what, I’ll always stay true to myself no matter where I go in the world.

XO

Instagram Isn’t Real

by: Alicia M. Blanco

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You are beautiful.

…without a filter.

Which leads me to this:

I LOVE me some instagram… it’s honestly my social media of choice. I love looking at pictures and posting pictures…

but it isn’t real! Not all the time.

Stop scrolling through it and comparing yourself to someone’s best version of themselves. You can bet they are ALSO going through some tough stuff, just like you. No one ACTUALLY posts the sucky stuff that’s actually going on.

It’s always a “booked it!” (after not booking five jobs before that one) and “selfie!” (which probably took over 70+ attempts before getting the right angle AND editing it with the right filter) and “on vacation, again!” (its like, where did they get the income to afford to go there, and there, with them, and those people, so often, and I’m over here trying to pay rent?)

I read an awesome blog just a few weeks ago called “What I Instagrammed vs What Was REALLY Happening” and it was soooo HILARIOUS and TRUE. So here it is. READ IT!! So damn good. Applause! I am so obsessed with great blogs. When I see a good one, I can’t help but to repost it. I just want to share the love and keep the wave going.

Imagine a world with no filters… just 100% honesty, transparency, realness.

Something tells me the statistics in depression would decrease if people didn’t have so much comparison throughout their days.

“Stop comparing your behind-the-scenes stuff to everyone else’s highlight reel.”

ESPY’s Highlight – Caitlyn Jenner

by: Alicia M. Blanco

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I wrote an article a while ago about Bruce Jenner- and I got a wave of responses to it. Everything from people who absolutely support and respect the transition, and others who are completely bothered and disgusted by it.

Whether or not you agree with what’s happening here, I think its important to acknowledge that the world we live in today is so much more diverse than its ever been before. I’m actually pretty excited to be living during such a unique time period as this.

Last night at the ESPYs, Caitlyn Jenner was presented with the Arthur Ashe award for COURAGE. Her acceptance speech obviously made me super emotional and I wanted to defend her today as I’m seeing a lot of people posting about how undeserving she is of such a prestigious award.

To me, courage comes in all different forms. From our military and armed forces who bravely defend our country day in and day out, to the kid at school who bravely defends his classmate being bullied – courage can be seen in many different ways.

Personally, I find Caitlyn’s story to be incredibly courageous and her award, completely deserved.

Imagine living your life with a miserable state of mind, just like Bruce was doing. Bruce hid behind a façade of masculinity and athleticism in order to distract him from his inner most thoughts – that he was actually a she. Imagine spending over six decades with a secret such as this and then, under a magnifying glass, making the very brave decision to open up to the entire WORLD about it.

Taking on an entirely new identity while the world watches, criticizes, ridicules, judges, and follows your every step has to be traumatic. And it takes major courage to do it anyway. My friend Terri said it perfectly today. She told me:

“every advance we ever make in this country starts with one person standing up and willing to take a beating from the public to shine a light on their cause—racism, women’s rights, gay rights and now transgenderism…”

Spot on, Terri.

It starts with one.

One person to stand up for what they believe in; Or one person to open up about their stories. Being relatable, approachable and vulnerable is courageous – Its being human in the most authentic form and not pretending everything is so damn perfect all of the time.

Caitlyn is doing it for the benefit of her own inner happiness and also for the countless others living today who struggle with gender identity.

Don’t tell me that’s not courageous.

(And I can’t even hate on her look last night either. Versace! HELLO! WERK, honey.)

My wish is that we can all live in a more accepting world. Why is it that when something good happens, (someone winning an award, for example) there has to be soooooo many people to instantly criticize it and find the problems with it instead? It’s almost depressing to open up my social media and see all the hate. It hasn’t even been 24 hours, people! I just want this to be a world where everyone can just be themselves and not feel sorry about it.

With that being said, I also want this to be a world where we can all respect each others varying opinions. What a boring world this would be if we all were on the same exact page about everything. So I’m not over here suggesting we all suppress our opinions on what’s going on in society, but rather, I am encouraging more love and kindness. That’s it. The old rule is “if you don’t have something nice to say, then don’t say anything at all.” But I would like to change that because I realize we shouldn’t subscribe to saying nothing at all. It’s just HOW YOU SAY IT that can make an impact…

I think we are here in this world to help each other out. And if you can’t help someone, just please, don’t hurt them.

[REPOSTED] Split Image

by Kate Fagan
ESPN

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In the amazingly written original article by Kate Fagan, we are introduced to Madison Holleran, a girl who appeared to have it all, (based on her social media, that is.) The article is so compelling that I had to repost it below.

Click here to read the full story about a girl who took her own life despite the happily filtered instagram life she portrayed to the world.

It really resonates with why I started The Wave in the first place. When Robin Williams committed suicide last year, I knew it was time for me to enter the blogsphere. There are so many beauty blogs out there, but not enough blogs talking about the tough stuff, like suicide.

How many people out there are silently suffering with issues of mental health, depression, contemplations of suicide…and yet are hiding behind the filters of social media pressures and image comparisons, completely pretending that they are fine and happy? Are you living your life unfiltered?

Thank you Kate Fagan for writing such a phenomenal piece that I hope reaches the masses and brings awareness to this issue.

Please [REPOST] this blog on your social media accounts. You never know who it can save!

Share with espnW:

How much do you filter your real self on social? Join the conversation by tagging @espnW and using #LifeUnfiltered when you post your photo and story on Instagram, Facebook or Twitter.

Madison Holleran’s friends share their unfiltered life stories
Five of Madison Holleran’s friends remove the filter — literally and metaphorically — from their social media accounts to disclose their true feelings during the shared moments in their lives.

Original post and content by Kate Fagan of ESPNw.

Split Waves on THE DRESS

by: Lisa Blanco Matthews

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O.K. so this whole #TheDress debate, or whatever it is, actually really annoyed me at first. I apparently missed the entire thing due to a thrilling Phoenix Suns overtime win over Oklahoma City Thunder last night (that’s in other news).

Therefore, when my sister, Alicia, asked me to write something about it #ForTheBlog, I was completely lost to say the least. “A dress? The color? What about it? How did I miss something when you’re the one in Dubai with limited WiFi.” I digress.

After extensive research and digging deep…REAL DEEP… I found that there actually is a great message behind this entire white, gold, blue, black ‘debate.’ Yes my friends, there issomething worthwhile here. Let’s get philosophical.

You may be choosing a side or color here, and it may stir up a heated conversation amongst co-workers, friends or spouses. Maybe you just CAN’T AGREE because CLEARLY the dress is white and gold! AMIRIGHT?

Well, whatever color you may see it’s all about PERSPECTIVE to me. You see what you want to see. It’s your RETINA, your DEPICTION…it’s YOUR OPINION.

I believe YOU choose what to get out of it. You’re in control. If you see blue and black then that’s what it is…stand by it. That’s the beauty here. It’s not about finding the actual color out of this mystery dress, it’s about ACCEPTING if someone’s view is COMPLETELY different than yours. And that’s O.K.

So can we agree to disagree on this and continue our conversation about AZ’s finest…llamas?